Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Femme Fat All!

"Experience is the only thing which will explain the logical reasoning that you have been waiting to understand."

Had a confusing, and ultimately revealing conversation about feminism with a friend recently. I never considered myself a feminist and honestly, I do not completely understand the concept or theory behind it. I read some articles on feminism and the general idea is women fought for rights to be treated equally with men. This goes to show that I never felt that someone else was chosen over me because I am a woman and as of today, I consider myself lucky. However, I see this theory applicable in certain areas such as some countries in the Middle East where a woman is not allowed to vote or study or work. Otherwise, I think men and women have different strengths and weaknesses and natural talents cannot be thrust upon each sex.
As the conversation moved on, self-choice of every woman came into the picture - her choice to marry or not, to have sex with her husband or not, claim the right to property and higher education and to say no to dowry among others. Then I realized that for me feminism is about empowering women to take a bold step, against the world need be and most importantly to take a difficult emotional decision that “society” and “they” do not expect a woman to make. In the least way of explanation – what if a married woman with no income and has three children losses her husband? Of course, you cannot expect a chunky trust fund. She cannot depend on others but needs to stand on her own feet. This is where an empowered, educated woman stands up to the melee of life. Theoretically, she should right?

I am fat. I am not pretty and the people who think I am beautiful are my friends who see my heart and are positively biased toward me. But that’s not the same way a person of interest views me. To him I am fat and not an eye candy, which sometimes is all that is needed. Young blood et all. But when the topics of physicality comes into play while I am already emotionally attached to the person, it is really hard to see things straight. This is at a point when I am in no marital commitment, societal or otherwise. If I can – an empowered, strong, independent, educated woman – can feel like shit, clingy and unable to move on in my life what can I expect of a woman who has been oppressed (harsh word but usage due to the lack of better word) all her life will tend to hold on to thin air. The friend then asked/said so “women are weaker?!”

I am now more tolerant towards women who give into their life’s non-choices. I don’t endorse it but I am definitely more tolerant and now more than ever believe I am a feminist.

1 comment:

  1. What a post!!! Killer...

    And I have never seen this blog!!! WTF!!!